Tuesday, June 10, 2008

So very Martha

My wedding came at the end of a busy week. During the week previous, Eddie took the MCAT, I finished student teaching, we both had finals, I graduated from college. By the time we got to Park City on our wedding night, we were so tired we could hardly see straight. We had a three-day honeymoon, and I think we left the room once, not (just) because we were getting all wild and crazy, but because we were exhausted.

Since that overscheduled week, it seems like every time we have a big event in our lives, I'm so tired from all of the preparation, that I can hardly enjoy the event. We've always lived far from our families, so every birth, every blessing, every graduation has meant lots of out-of-town family coming to stay with us.

Bryce is getting baptized this weekend. Eddie has yet another graduation. Starting tomorrow, our family will pour in. As a result, I spent all day cleaning. I clean my house regularly, but today I spent four hours just in the kitchen. Before my in-laws arrive tomorrow, I still have a bunch of bedrooms and a garage to clean. Why do I do it? I don't really know. My in-laws don't care (my mom is coming too, and she sorta does), but I just can't help myself. I feel like I can't let them in the house if I have a dusty laundry room or my pantry isn't perfectly organized.

So tomorrow night they'll arrive, eager to see the grandkids and excited to spend the next week with us. By that time, I'm sure I'll be so tired from all of the feverish cleaning that I'll be staring at the walls and murmuring "uh-huh" at what I hope will be appropriate intervals.

I've decided that Martha probably wasn't annoyed just because Mary was listening to Jesus instead of helping out with the dinner. Martha was probably cranky because she'd spent days getting ready for Jesus to arrive and she was tired.

14 comments:

Amber said...

I'm also a Martha. Very much so. Good luck this week!

Courtney said...

I'm more of a Mary (more because I'm lazy than anything) but I still feel the same way whenever we have a big event.

Blue said...

My kitchen's so small that I can't imagine doing every possible thing, including alphabetizing all my spices and canned goods and boxed foods, and being in there for that long!

This probably means I'm a Mary. Maybe Mary was just not as fastidious as Martha. She probably realized that there was work she *could* do, but opted out because, like me, it was good enough. If there is such thing for a guest like the Savior. But like Martha, I'd want things pretty darn nice if He were coming for a visit.

Geee, after this confession you probably won't want to eat at my house! :-) But even if my spices aren't organized, I try to maintain proper food prep and handling procedures. At least we haven't died of The Salmonella yet! ♥

smart mama said...

ditto courtney-- I save the cleaning for my mom- how can i rob her of her joy!

lyn said...

At first (only reading the title) I thought you were referring to another Martha. I say skip the garage and any room a guest won't be sleeping in.

Anonymous said...

I do understand -- I do the same no matter who's coming, and I know often that those coming don't care. You know I don't care what your house is like -- I come to see all of you. But when you or anyone come here, I'm down there scrubbing and stuffing! Take a break today and I'll see you tomorrow! Can't wait.
Love, Annie

Anonymous said...

Is it worth it?

Shelah said...

Is what worth it? Are the guests worth it? Absolutely. I love my family and I want to be with them a lot more than I get the chance to. If we could all live in one big happy commune, I'd be thrilled. But then they'd be around enough to know that my house isn't always perfect. When they only come twice a year like my ILs do, I can still keep up the illusion. Is the clean house worth it? Well, it's very nice to have a clean house, and it's nice not to feel embarrassed by the mess. But the fatigue isn't much fun, and neither is the feeling that if I finish cleaning more than ten minutes before they walk in the door, I'll be trying to shoo everyone out of the house to keep up the image of perfection.

Patience said...

Shelah...
You are fabulous. Have a great week with all of your guests. Maybe you could send everyone off to a movie or park so that you can sneak in a nap for an hour or so :) Or, there are always those solitary runs to help regroup mentally, if not physically!

Sarah said...

amen, Shelah.

I hope all goes well this weekend. Scott is always telling to not worry about cleaning, but I can't sleep if it's not all perfect before the family comes. I'd rather be exhausted with a clean house than rested with a slightly messy house. Maybe it's a curse.

Anonymous said...

Have fun Shelah. Enjoy your time with your family.

Terry Mastny said...

Shelah --- don't clean for me more than you would for yourself. Your house is a family home. Its better to be lived in with love than 'perfectly' empty. By the way --- while babysitting tonight --- I folded all your laundry. Maybe you can catch a couple extra winks! Love, Mom

Company EIGHT said...

Shelah, I am a total Mary and I could have written this post almost word for word. I don't just do it for out-of-town guests though--anytime I host anything for any reason I go through the same process. For me I think it's worth it, just for my peace of mind. If I didn't do it, I would never be able to relax, because I would be thinking about the extra dust, or clutter, or unorganized spot!

Bilary said...

Just wanted to say "hi" and that I think you are darling! I always love what you have to say on the board so I thought I would check out your blog. I love it!

I completely agree with your theory on Martha. I never thought of it that way, but it kinda makes you wonder....