Sunday, August 5, 2007

The story of the rings...

This is just because you asked. It's not a story that puts me in the most favorable light, I'll tell you in advance. Instead, it shows my cranky, greedy side.



Eddie got home from his mission in June of 1996. I had waited for him eagerly (very, very eagerly). I wrote him often-- so often in fact that he had a visiting general authority tell him that he had to write me and tell me to write less. I wrote him a four-page letter every other day for his entire mission. Crazy, I know. I guess I didn't have a lot going on then. I also wanted to prove everyone wrong who said I couldn't do it. I also loved the guy, which is a good thing, because it would be wrong to marry a guy just because someone else didn't want me during those two years and I proved that I could remain an aged side of beef in the meat market that is BYU.



Anyway, by the time he got home, I had had two years to think and plan exactly what I wanted in an engagement ring. I knew I wanted a round center stone with a baguette on each side. But I only wanted that if I could get a big enough center stone. If I couldn't have a large-ish stone, I decided I wanted a substantial anniversary band, and I'd add a big solitaire down the road.



The problem is that I had never actually been ring shopping. I didn't really know how much rings cost, or how the ring I thought I wanted would look on my finger. My mom talked me out of the idea of an anniversary band instead of a solitaire (it's not "engagement" enough, she said). Eddie had never had a job up to this point and therefore had zero money, so we were relying on the generosity of his parents when it came to the ring.



He had been home from his mission for about a month when we went ring shopping. By that point, his mom and I had joined forces and found a place to hold he reception, and the wedding machine was growing into a force beyond his control. His mom ordered him to take me out and buy me a ring. Another important bit of information-- he hates shopping. Hates it. Will do anything to avoid it. For example, every couple of years he goes to the shoe store and buys two or three pairs at once, just so he will be darn sure that he doesn't have to set foot in a shoe store for another couple of years. I'm sure he would have given our firstborn child in exchange for a reprieve from going ring shopping. Since I was young and hadn't seen the guy for the last two years, I guess I didn't really understand this about him.



So we went to the first store and gave him a general idea of what I wanted, which the jeweler said they'd have to order. So we went to the second store (the one recommended by his parents), and I found a ring similar to the one I had been dreaming of. The band was quite a bit more delicate than what I had originally planned, but it was close. Eddie took "close" to mean "exactly what I want." The band was also quite expensive (more than half of our total budget) which meant that our budget for the center stone was decreased. But I knew Eddie well enough to know that he was done shopping. If I suggested going to a third store, I might end up with no ring at all, and after waiting 25 months for this guy, the last place I wanted to end up was at square one.



So my original engagement ring was ring #1.



We also bought a very thin plan gold band as my wedding band, which was ring #2.



After the newness of wearing the ring wore off, I realized I didn't love it as much as I hoped. So for the next few years I tried to find a way to modify it so I would love it.



The first thing we did was buy a delicate anniversary band (ring #3), which helped a bit, but the overall look was still really delicate.



After that I bought a wide gold band (#4), hoping that the width of the band would make the engagement ring look more substantial. It didn't work. In fact, it made it look smaller. All four of these rings were bought before we left Provo at the end of the first year of our marriage.



A couple of years down the road, Eddie got me a big (1.5 carat) QVC diamonique ring (#5). It was what I would have wanted to begin with if we had had an unlimited budget. I wore it for a couple of years, until I got tired of that too.



When I was pregnant with Isaac, I spent a few months online searching for a new setting for the original engagment ring. Eventually, I found a website where I could have my original center stone put into a 3-stone ring. So that's what I did. I got a 4mm pipe-cut wedding band to match. (rings 6&7). Now I wear the 3-stone ring with the pipe cut band most days, but I also wear the pipe cut band with the anniversary band sometimes too. I'm finally pretty happy with what I have.



Of course, with the money we spent on rings 2-7, I could have gotten the ring I really wanted in the first place, but that's beside the point. Eddie also knows that once he hits it big, I'm upgrading. I've already negotiated for $1,000 for each year we've been married when it comes time to upgrade.



Now that you know how shallow and materialistic I am, do you still like me?



--originally published 4/29/07

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