So what does it say about me that the one person who guessed correctly is the person who barely knows me at all? Does it mean I'm a good liar? Maybe the lies were just more interesting than my real life (I must live by the motto "talk big, live small"). But whatever, the reason, I stumped most of you, including a momentary stumping of my husband, who thought for a second that I lived a less-cloistered life than I had previously owned up to while he was knocking on doors and getting bitten by dogs in Ukraine.
So, here you go:
#1 I went to the U2 Zooropa concert at Giants Stadium in the summer of 1992. I was 17. My parents let me and three girlfriends drive from Connecticut to New Jersey all by ourselves. If they had known the things we would see at the concert they would have been wise to reconsider their decision.
False. I had a ticket to go to the concert, but sold it to a friend when I decided to go to computer camp instead. Yes, I am a nerd.
#2 Very few people know this, but when Eddie was on his mission I kissed someone else. Yeah, I know, I know, you all think I was the most faithful girlfriend ever. And I was, except for this one time that I went on a date with a friend from my French class and he wanted to speak French in more ways than one. I sort of liked him, but the whole thing freaked me out too much and I spent the rest of the semester avoiding him.
False (so stop having a heart attack, honey!). I did go on a date with a guy from my French class. We doubled with a former mission companion and his date. The guys took us to a luau, and spent most of the night talking to each other in the unintelligible-to-me version of French spoken in Tahiti. And since the guys spent so much time talking to each other, his date and I started to bond, and I told her that I was waiting for a missionary. The guys overheard us, and spent the rest of the night promising me that I couldn't wait, and that if I did wait, he'd dump me when he got home. So, needless to say, there was no lovin' going on that night, although he did try to put the moves on me when we went to watch a movie in his apartment after the luau. Yuck!
#3 All of our kids have been conceived in places other than our bed. Bryce on a trip to Southern Utah (get it?), Annie on a belated anniversary weekend at the Ritz-Carlton in St. Louis, and Isaac in an unmentionable place in our home in Minnesota.
Sorry to be boring guys, but this one is false too. We went to Southern Utah earlier the same summer that I got pregnant with Bryce, spent a weekend at the Ritz a few weeks before I got pregnant with Annie, and Isaac, like the other two, was conceived at home, in bed.
#4 The first time Eddie kissed me was on Labor Day 1993 while on a hike with his student ward in Rock Canyon. We had only met a couple of days earlier and hadn't been on a date yet, so I was a little bit surprised and taken aback by the whole experience (but in a good way).
I did go hiking with Eddie and his student ward on Labor Day 1993. We had been hanging out for a few days, but had not gone out on a date yet. And although I really wanted him to (having always been a kiss-on-the-first-date kind of girl), he did not kiss me while we were on the hike. Heck, he wouldn't even share the same water bottle with me. I guess he got over his germaphobia later in the week though, because he finally, after spending all week together 24/7, planted one on me that Friday night.
#5 As a teenager, I was only called into the bishop's office to make a confession one time.
Coming home from youth conference we in the girls car started playing "can you top this" with the boys in the next car. When Dwayne showed us his boxer-covered butt, my only way to top that was to show a full moon. The bishop heard about it and called me to repentance. At least I didn't goose them.
Yep! If you know anything about me, you should know that nudity is my forte, therefore if it involves me and nakedness in any form, it's probably true.
--originally published 2/15/06
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