We live in a neighborhood with lots of young kids, but not nearly as many older kids. Our ward is similar-- just a couple of Young Women, and a nursery nearly 70 strong. So babysitters are in high demand here. I've been using the same babysitter since we moved here, and always felt a nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach whenver it was time to call her. Sometimes I'd call and say, "If there's a night over the next three weeks when you're available, please let me know" but if I needed her on a specific night, I knew I needed to reserve her early, because all of the moms of the 69 other nursery kids were likely to be calling her too.
One of the brightest spots in our neverending summer was suddenly finding myself with more than one option for a babysitter. First, our regular babysitter's little sister came of babysitting age (she's 11, almost 12, but it works for me). Then a family moved into the ward, and their three teenagers have all announced from the pulpit that they are ready and willing to babysit. Better yet, they're homeschooled, so they can even come on school nights or during the day, which means I might actually make it to a dentist appointment once this year. I love that I can call up either house and ask for any of the kids who would be willing to sit for us on a particular night. It greatly increases my chances of finding someone and decreases the number of calls I have to make (and therefore the nervous feeling in my stomach that only brownies seem to satisfy).
So we've been going out a lot more often this summer. I used to call our sitter only when it was absolutely necessary (for boring work parties and the like-- approximately every couple of months) because I was too afraid of rejection (when you're calling teenagers, I guess you tend to revert to a teenage rejection mentality). Now, with five potential sitters, we've been going out every other week. I've eaten so well (we went to the Melting Pot last night and it was GOOD!), but most of all, I've had so much fun dating my husband. It's not like I've fallen out of love with him or gotten bored or anything like that, but going out with him regularly reminds me of how much I like him as a person, not just as a dad or a couch potato or a lump on the other side of the bed.
Ever since I got married I've heard marriage counselors give the advice that couples should go on a weekly date. When we were first married, we always did. Once we added a houseful of kids, it seemed like an impossibility. But now it seems like a bi-monthly date might be possible-- and I'm enjoying how much fun dates with Eddie can be! And even though a babysitter is pricey, it's definitely cheaper, and more fun I'd imagine, than therapy.
5 comments:
I hear ya on that! We just found a babysitter that we love! It's so nice to come home to a house full of sleeping kids.
Awesome, Shelah! I'm in search of a good babysitter that is not in our ward and preferrably our Stake. I'm tired of it being Girls Camp or something that keeps ALL the YW from being available. And since the next Stake is about 10 minutes away, I should be able to find someone else. And the part about those sisters being able to come during the day? Wow. Priceless! I'm not a fan of "trading babysitting" w/other moms, I'd rather just pay someone. You're so lucky!
Very lucky, Shelah! I have had rotten luck with sitters so we mostly "date at home" (whatever). I am totally counting down the 2-3 years when I'll be able to leave my eldest in charge for a short while to go on a date with my husband.
We've gotten really bad at this. I have those same feelings of rejection too and always put off calling sitters until the last minute. We don't even know any here, yet and our romantic life is feeling it.
I like my husband too.
Ditto on the dating less thing. Although we have a good free babysitter (my mom) I feel guilty using her and not my sister (not free and not quite as good) who is 15. But we're so broke right now and it's hard to date without spending money.
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